Night Terrors

So I know this is a bit personal but I need to get this out and being that I am not even sure if anyone will read it im just going to let it all out/ Let just point out that night terrors suck so bad! I have been dealing with them for a while now but thought that they had gone away but apparently they hadn't. Last night was the start and it is making sleep impossible. I tossed and turned all night last night and woke my boyfriend up the middle of one kneeing him in the side because I was freaking out so badly and he had to shake me and talk to me to get me to wake up, not to terribly bad of one because I got woken up in time but then I fell asleep today for an hour and had another one and it lasted what seemed like forever because I was losing it and it took a lot of effort from him to wake me up. Thank God he was there because they used to be so bad that I would pass out before my body gave up and woke up. I don't want this again! I need my sleep and with the fact that they are happening my body flips out so much I don't get any rest what so ever and I know that it is affecting my boyfriend because he gets woken up every time that they happen in the middle of the night. I feel completely helpless because the only way to keep them away is to stay awake or wake myself up every ten minutes and that doesn't work because there is no rest what so ever involved. And I am petrified to sleep for fear of it happening again and hurting myself or even worse my boyfriend if he were to try and wake me up and im so far in that I react in my dream and punch him or push him off the bed, he knows when to back off but i still don't want anyone to get hurt and it hurts knowing that I can't do anything about it at this point.Him and our roommate are the only ones that know about them or have experienced them. I just want a decent night of sleep where i can cuddle with my boyfriend and not have to worry about waking up with a throbbing knee( I knee the wall) or having a aching body the next morning still sleepless. I wish I knew what to do to make them go away but nothing seems to work. Looks like it is going to be a long night of blogging and homework to keep my mind from letting myself sleep.

Never changing me

Well technically the reason for me to sign up to this site was because other sites were causing drama such as Tumblr therefore I couldnt vent which is  a must for me. But first let me introduce myself, I am Jessica, 21,Living the life really. I just moved to the greatest small town on the place of the planet and it is incredible. I grew up in a town that eventually started to smother me and wasnt letting it grip loosen until I had to fight for it, with the help of my boyfriend I was able to start afresh. Well this is me, I am who I am no matter who tries to change me.